1. Matt said, “We are working hard to be right rather than be righteous.” Think about a recent conflict or tension in one of your relationships. What usually drives you more—to be understood, to be right, or to understand the other person? What might change if understanding became the goal?
2. Ephesians 5:1–2 says we are to “be imitators of God as beloved children” and “walk in love as Christ loved us.”What do you notice about the connection between knowing we are loved by God and how we love others? How might this change the way you approach conflict in your relationships?
3. Matt challenged us to “seek to understand before being understood” and to learn how the other person is wired. What is one difference between you and someone close to you that you’ve been tempted to see as wrong rather than simply different? How could you begin to appreciate that difference?
4. Read Ephesians 5:21–33. Verse 21 says, “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” How does starting with mutual submission shape the way you understand what Paul says to wives and husbands in the verses that follow? What do you think mutual submission looks like in practice?
5. Matt said, “Your words matter” and encouraged us to use our words to call out life, build others up, and speak truth in love. What kind of words or communication make you feel valued and respected? How could you become more intentional about using your words to bring life to the people around you?
6. Ephesians 5:25 calls husbands to love their wives “as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” What does Christ’s example reveal about the kind of love Paul is describing? What would it look like to use your strength, influence, or position to serve and build up another person rather than yourself?
7. Genesis 2:24 says that a man and woman become “one flesh,” and Paul connects this passage to marriage in Ephesians 5:31–32. What stands out to you about the idea of covenant and becoming one? How is a covenant relationship different from a relationship based primarily on chemistry, feelings, or what the other person can do for you?
8. Matt said that strong relationships that reflect the love of Jesus can be one of our greatest forms of evangelism. What do people see about Jesus when they watch the way we handle conflict, differences, commitment, and love? What is one practical way you could reflect the love of Jesus more clearly in a relationship this week?